I just wanted to share this link to Tom’s (Andy) account of a “drag race” where he rode his bicycle dressed as a chick. And I gotta say if he looked anymore like…I just dun no.
I realized that it is like two days from Valentine’s today when someone asked me if I like the holiday. I got to say I am ardently ambiguous on the subject this year. I am not dating anyone, don’t really have any prospects, but for some reason I frankly feel totally indifferent this year. Women can’t live with em’…pass me a fucking beer.
I guess being at the age I am, I might have already made my final verdict on love and marriage and all things romantic. I don’t think that I was with anyone this time of the year last year (if I can’t remember, well then- ya know). Hell, I am sitting here taping away, trying to remember the last names of several girls I have dated and I am finding it funny that the ones I do remember, it ended very badly with them all.
Thinking back the only time in recent years when I remember having plans on V day she canceled a few hours before. More wine for me baby.
The desperation to be in a long term relationship among the girls of my age group (which I have mentioned in previous posts), can also work to ones advantage especially at this time of year (thank you Walgreen’s displays and incessant television commercials). Take for instance my name and occupation of Friday last…
Terry Noonan, line crew co-captain of the Tide team at Gateway racetrack. The key is to have an interesting job (mine was totally concocted in this case, don’t even know if its real) that there is in no way she can have any esoteric knowledge of. And an easy to recite fake number committed to memory- I myself use the White House switchboard number.
And here I’d like to take the time to share with my friend Rocky a quote I enjoy about marriage (seeing as how he is getting married and all):
“Marriage is an important part of getting ahead. It lets people know you're not a homo. A married guy seems more stable. People see the ring, and they think, ‘At least somebody can stand the son of a bitch.’ Ladies see the ring, they know immediately that you must have some cash, and your cock must work.”
-Elerby, The Departed
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2 comments:
Yeah V-day is a crock. Just another excuse to rack up some credit card debt on someone who will probably pawn whatever you buy them after you break up.
Amen to that TR
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